Talk about women’s empowerment in 21st century is shameless: Shoojit Sircar
Last night, I was having an argument with a friend of mine about equality between men and women.
“This is a patriarchal society. Men always dominate over women. Women are considered to be a weaker section of the society, who continuously have to face discrimination on the basis of gender, color and body structure. There is no equality- be it in job wages or distributing household work.”
“There is a difference between fairness and equality”, he said. “You feminists mix everything up. “
“Can you define both the terms for me?” I asked.
“Fairness is when we do not discriminate between people. We give them what they deserve. Equality is when we start treating both the parties uniformly.”
“I think it is high time that we are given what we deserve. Women around the world are still fighting for basic rights, i.e. human rights. Why can’t we enjoy the same laws that are for men? Why everything must be rewritten for women?”
“Look”, he continued, “You just want rights without responsibilities. I’ll give you an example. You want to enter temples that forbid women. You only think about your right. What about the faith of the thousands of devotees that is being compromised for the sake of your stubbornness? Is this fair for the devotees? Is this equality? Is this feminism? To try and become men? Honestly speaking, if men would behave like you girls then how would this world be?”
Isn’t it sad that a temple that denies women entry actually makes more headlines and has a faster speed of judgment than a rape case? And, it has always been like this: cows are more important than women in India.
A poor woman cannot take a microfinance loan if she is a widow or is unmarried. If she is married, she has to have her husband as her nominee and if she is a widow, her son would be her nominee. Unmarried women can have their unmarried brothers as nominee. Here’s the irony: microfinance in India started with the sole purpose of uplifting poor women. And I believe that a woman without an income source and a life partner is the most vulnerable in the society.
“I am sorry to say this, but take another example. Feminists always complain about glass ceiling at workplaces. But studies show that after 35, most of the women tend to either leave the organisation or decide to slow down in their career paths because they focus more on their families than their jobs. Women, though, are good at multitasking, lack negotiation skills.
They tend to be more agreeable than men are. Men tend to be more aggressive and egoistic and hence can sign off a deal better.”
Needless to say, feminism has hurt the pride of men more often than unemployment has. Men love to be dominant. I have seen endless jokes on how men are afraid of their wives and how wives take decisions for the family. Do they?
I could not argue with him that night. That night, I felt as if I have been silenced forever. This is 2020 and I live in a Tier 2 city. I am an ardent blogger who writes extensively on women. Why are we still discussing about this?
Maybe, he has got a point. Throughout history, women have been portrayed as weaklings, not because others have forced that notion onto them, but as they have felt the same. I have seen girls in mechanical engineering workshops acting like fragile pieces of glass, diverting their work to guys. I have seen mothers telling daughters not to take up sports as they might hurt themselves or get dark by running around in the sun. I have also seen a lot of housewives putting up all the chores that would require them to go out onto their husbands. Knowingly or unknowingly, we have crept into an orthodox mindset that crushes our ambitions before they take roots.
The ongoing patriarchy since generations has created a vacuum for a well balanced society, where currently women are being given reservations and opportunities, at the cost of the prospects for the general public, specifically men. Today, the general average male without an EWS status is the most unfortunate candidate in competitive examinations. Why? Because he has his seats given away as uplifting opportunities to the “lesser mortals”.
After this entire discussion, though I realised that though fairness is a very important criteria for women empowerment in its own merit, equality is a necessity as it would further push them to grow in their lives. A girl child needs to be treated the same way as a male child is. Let them play together with cars and dolls. Let’s not celebrate women’s day more vividly than fathers’ day. Let a man’s success story be an inspiration for a small girl somewhere, if there is no lady around to guide her.
THE FUNKY WRITER 