THE ROAD NOT TAKEN……..

I had never felt that life would take such a sharp turn. I had literally thought that if I study hard, things would fall in their right places.

Nothing of that sort ever happened.

For I learnt that when you grow up, the responsibilities also multiply; and not to mention, the stress of decision making.

Never believe that your duties are over……because just then you discover that the race has just begun.

I always feel low, but this year has been devastating. Born on 1st April, 1996, I became the “April Fool” of everyone’s eyes. Why I was born on that year, not a year earlier or later, I wonder. Then perhaps my situation would not have been so critical as it is now. I’m literally at a triple point now. It might amuse you, but let me tell you that my batch was the first to be experimented on CCE type of learning method: year 2009 and the first ever batch to give a JEE Main, JEE Advanced and NEET UG paper: year 2013. I’m dumbstruck. Its not good to be the cup of tea of a panel of educationists. No, never. If sometimes we can’t stand lectures of teachers, how can you ever expect us students to be manhandled by the Education minister? Man, that’s worse than a nightmare!

As I was saying, I am a 17 year old KID. Because I let my parents take my decisions and I can’t take my own decisions. I keep wondering whether my decision would be right or wrong, what would be the pros and cons…………so confused.

It all started from March this year. The tension was running at a high velocity, bumping right onto my little brain. The Class 12 CBSE Board Examinations. Fair enough. It passed away, gripping onto my sleepless nights. Next came the entrance examinations. They were the real tests of my understanding and my keys for getting into a good college. They were ruthless. The nervousness before a test , the tough question papers, the small gaps for rough scribbling, the negative marking, the time limit, the hot and sultry rooms, the anxiety on the face of both parents and the child about the percentage of the child clearing the test, the frantic search on internet for latest answers, the scolding and sobs  upheaval at home, the long wait for result declaration, the mixed feeling of anger, happiness and sadness, the curses on the students to have tried better, the registration and reporting at the required college, the high fees………………………………………………………………….

Finally, allotted to the college and studies can start.

While giving exams, I had never thought about all this.

Such a long journey to success……..yet an eternal failure…………….

Thriving on parents’ money, working for their expectations and personal upliftment…….

Purchasing smiles on parents’ tears………….

Trying on stand on own feet while squishing their hands………………

Yeah this is me……………….

Curses on this poor child.

Why was I ever born?

I can never, ever take a decision correctly. Can’t distinguish between stuff. I wonder how my school made me Class Monitor and School Captain. Well, what did they see in me?

I don’t know what they saw in me, but now I’ve surely seen myself: I’m trying to follow my dream by establishing my parents’ poverty.

There was a tie between two institutions I was supposed to join: KIIT University and VSSUT, Burla. Both were tempting enough for me to choose from. Let me outline the pros and cons for you:

KIIT UNIVERSITY

• Situated at my home town
• Branch allotted: Mechanical Engineering
• Private Institution, expensive; though going to attain International Status: With best of the best facilities one can ever imagine
• Take part in various extra curricular activities
• Take coaching for CAT and GATE
• Stay with family
• Try for Medical Entrance Examinations once again

VSSUT, Burla

• Government Institution, one of the oldest in India: Feel proud to study there
• Branch allotted: Metallurgical and Materials Engineering
• Perhaps going to attain NIT status someday

Both the options have been so tempting for me that it was [ and still is ] a very hard decision for me to choose one. A typical hamlet situation: to be or not to be.

For my happiness my parents spent a lot of money so that I could read in an institution where I would read happily and bring pride and laurels for my family. But this was not to happen. My mind keeps wandering at a triple point:

• Study for medical entrance exams.
• Go to VSSUT and try for a branch change.
• Study for medical entrance exams along with studying in KIIT so that my 1 year may not be totally a drop situation.

People give a lot of advices, but I was the one to choose my path to glory. When I wanted to join VSSUT, my parents were a strict no no but my cries finally led them to do my admission there. I mean, who on earth wants to leave a chance to join a Government institution? But I don’t know what has happened to me. When I came back home, my mindset was changed.

“I want to stay with you, Mummy and study for Medical Entrance Exams once again.”

My parents were bewildered. “What on earth do you want? Why are you so confused? Do you know for your childishness how much we have to pay?”

And this is it. When I make up  my mind to study at KIIT, I think of MBBS. Just then, I think of VSSUT and my head moves 360 degrees once again.

I kept on crying since I saw on the website of OJEE about VSSUT, and I am crying till date. My future is bleak. I have no present, no future. I have broken it before it started taking own shape. I have no idea what’s going on. Two years…….I had got 2 years……..perhaps I did not use them well. I went for coaching. 4.5 hours everyday. I never missed a day at my school. I was the class monitor. I have cleaned tables, blackboards and swept the classroom. But today I’m lost. My parents, are as depressed as I am. They have always helped me within their means. My mother never pesters me to do any household work. Both of them always take good care of me and have never let me go deprived of some facility due to its high cost. If I start writing down everything, then perhaps you would stop reading the post.

Life has just begun, but yet I think of death. It must be so peaceful. Calmness and serenity……………………I yearn for it……….But I’m still not done, my friends! Someday, may be someday I’d do such a thing that would make my parents and my school feel proud of me. Then I won’t have to bear the shame of studying at a private university, how nice it may be. Perhaps I might crack Medical Entrance Exams next year……..Then a new struggle would await me.

Debashrita

“Do what you think is right even if you are criticised. You’ll be damned if you do and you will be damned if you don’t.”

: AFTER CLASS 12: DROPPING, EAVESDROPPING :POSSIBLE REASONS AND AMICABLE SOLUTIONS

Remember the line from the movie 3 idiots: “Life is a race”? Yes, you have got it all right. Our lives are now dangling from the post. Because we have now completed Class 12 and have still no idea about what we want to be when we “grow up”.

Its really traumatic for me and millions of students like me to figure out a line which they want to make their destination. With 2 years of hard labor for board and entrance exams, congratulations to all those guys who have qualified with flying colors. One of my classmates has secured 96% in CBSE 12^th Board Exams and got a seat under Aeronautical Engineering in IIT Chennai. Brilliant guy, lucky enough? Well this may sound absurd, but actually both hard work and luck play equal roles in administrating our career. My friend secured 94% and did qualify NEET 2013 [like me], but still she’s dropping a year because this year we have no idea what is going on. The counseling dates for various states are not yet out. She’s dropping, because: [most possible reasons]

·         She is determined to crack NEET next year and fulfill her dream of becoming a successful cardiologist.

·         Next time luck will surely favor her as in one year she would have learnt many things. God will surely reward her for her hard work.

·         She’s not prepared to learn something else.

I feel the third point is not with me and many students. We know we have to make something out of our lives, but sadly we can’t pinpoint to a direction. Even after career counseling, we are unable to make a decision. But why?

Perhaps the answer lies in us.

I believe the following points are responsible for our fallacy:

·         Choosing wrong stream after class 10. It is really better to get 90% in Arts rather than scoring 50% in Science stream. One of my classmates wanted to learn Economics. But her father pushed her into Science stream. She could never pass a single class test.

·         Decision taken by parents instead of students for their liking subject. True, I admit that a parent will always choose a career which has more money; but if the child wants to study history, what’s wrong in that? Remember, its your life, not your parents, that is going to be affected by perhaps the biggest decision of your life till date.

·         Jack of all trades, master of none. I’m the perfect example. I love biology. So I wanted to become a doctor/zoologist. I love physics too. Hence I wanted to become a space scientist. I love uniforms, marching and salute. So I wanted to join Air Force. So many thoughts. But I was going coaching for engineering entrance exams. Hence, somehow I did qualify but I failed to live up to even my own expectations.

·         Being smart is another factor. You are so good in all the subjects that sometimes you fail to realize where you can exploit your maximum potentials.

So after all the results of entrance exams are out, we students are seen scrambling in front of various educational institutions. If not medical, then engineering. If not engineering, then B.Sc. or other Vocational courses. Have you prioritized your life in this way? If not this then that? If we would try to stick to a particular line, perhaps the competition in various entrances would also lessen up. We try to have our hands full all the time, but end up with empty pockets. Of course there are less seats and a vast population and a lot of reservations, but we can’t change that. We have to live under the system. But we need to think out of the box. Something new. Why do we choose B.Sc. if we don’t qualify in professional courses? Is it really that bad? Not at all. It all depends on our dedication and performance. Our mindsets. Everything is okay. We just need to change our thinking perspectives. After all, we are the future of our country.

So guys like me, cheer up. And my juniors, do take my advice seriously. This is our chance to make history. So get, set and go!